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Our friendship ended over my vacation decision

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DEAR ABBY: I was offered a beach condo. I invited my friend “Sara,” then another and another. These women had heard of each other but didn’t really know each other. I assumed we could all have a great time.

When I told Sara I had invited others, she backed out!

It has been three months, and she has refused all invitations to get together. We used to talk daily and see each other weekly.

I have apologized. How do I get Sara to forgive me for not having given her a “heads up” before inviting the others? Was what I did so bad that she would end a long friendship?

MISSING HER IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR MISSING: No. I suspect Sara may have other reasons for taking 10 steps back, and inviting others to join you was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Was she jealous? Did she need time alone with you to confide in you? Have you been able to discuss with her the reason for her extreme reaction? It might save the relationship if you could find out.

However, if Sara is unwilling to talk about it, perhaps you should consider yourself lucky to have seen this punitive side of her so you can step back.



DEAR ABBY: I was offered a beach condo. I invited my friend “Sara,” then another and another. These women had heard of each other but didn’t really know each other. I assumed we could all have a great time.

When I told Sara I had invited others, she backed out!

It has been three months, and she has refused all invitations to get together. We used to talk daily and see each other weekly.

I have apologized. How do I get Sara to forgive me for not having given her a “heads up” before inviting the others? Was what I did so bad that she would end a long friendship?

MISSING HER IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR MISSING: No. I suspect Sara may have other reasons for taking 10 steps back, and inviting others to join you was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Was she jealous? Did she need time alone with you to confide in you? Have you been able to discuss with her the reason for her extreme reaction? It might save the relationship if you could find out.

However, if Sara is unwilling to talk about it, perhaps you should consider yourself lucky to have seen this punitive side of her so you can step back.

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